the abcs of us.

the super fun list going around the blog world:)

richard

age:  29

bedsize:  queen

chore you hate:  dishes

dogs:  one day…for now butch will do

essential start of your day:  workout at the gym

favorite color:  green

gold or silver:  silver

height:  6’1”

instruments you play:  none, i always wanted to learn either piano or sax

job title:  sorter

kids: 0

live:  vegas baby!

mom's name:  lorraine

nicknames:  -

overnight hospital stays:  2

pet peeve:  the closet light being left on

quote from a movie: “first rule about fight club, you don’t talk about fight club.”–fight club

 right or left handed:  left

siblings:  2 sisters

time you wake up:  during the week – 730a on the dot

underwear:  boxer briefs

vegetable(s) you hate:  squash, cauliflower, spinach

what makes you late:  traffic

x-rays you have had done:  teeth

yummy food you make:  steaks

zoo animal:  lion-o

katy beth

age:   25

bedsize:  queen

chore you hate:  emptying the dishwasher/putting away laundry

dogs: one day…

essential start of your day:  coffee! 

favorite color:  red, blue, pink

gold or silver:  silver

height:  5’7”

instruments you play: not musically talented at all

job title:  assistant director of admissions

kids:  one day…

live:  vegas baby!

mom's name:  nancy

nicknames:  ladybug, boomer, kb

overnight hospital stays:  none, knock on wood

pet peeve:  being talked at instead of talked too

quote from a movie:  "there you see her/sitting there across the way/ she don’t got a lot to say/ but theres something about her/ and you don’t know why/ but you’re dying to try/ you wanna kiss the girl"-the little mermaid

right or left handed:  right

siblings:  1 “little” brother

time you wake up:  too stinkin early

underwear:  always wear cute ones, no matter who is looking:)

vegetable(s) you hate:  peas, spinach, brussel sprouts

what makes you late: tv, phones, traffic, choosing clothes me

x-rays you have had done:  teeth, ankle, knees

yummy food you make:  pumpkin chocolate chip cookies

zoo animal:  hippos

now its your turn to fill it out:)

the living with a runner thing.

i started running about 2 years ago and instantly fell in love.  growing as an athlete running was always my least favorite part, ok i down right hated it.  something completely turned around though when i started training 1/2 marathons.  it was the perfect outlet for anything i needed.  i run by myself usually with my music, but sometimes with nothing at all.  i dont run for times, or to place in a race, or to beat the fastest person.  i run for me.  more about all of that in another post. 

when i first met richard i was already about 1 month into training for my 1st race.  he has been there since the beginning and never saw another side.  he was there for my very 1st 10k and almost every race since.  but coming to be that fantastic support and being there everyday is a totally different thing.  when we first moved in i wasnt training, i had just come off my 3rd 1/2 marathon and was ready for a rest.  i was on a mission to lose the weight i had gained on an awful protein shake i had taken on my last training cycle, which at that point didnt even include the gym. 

richard has always been super healthy and a gym rat the whole time i have known him.  i may not agree with the weight gainer shake he takes or going to the gym at 8am when he doesnt go to bed until 2 am.  but he is super dedicated to his goals and its amazing to live with someone so committed to the gym and health.  he definitely helps motivate me to get up in the morning to do my own training.

now when i say get up in the morning, i dont quite mean at 8am to go with him.  i mean more like 6am to go run 4 miles outside in january. 

even in las vegas we get pretty damn cold in the winter.  this was the morning i was still cold after the shower, coffee and about 2 hours into my work day.  and its a 5-day a week habit.  there are training plans and runs that have to get worked into the week.  no matter how i feel when that alarm goes off i have to get up and go.   if i skip a day it has to be for a fantastic reason.  i went light on training for my 2nd 1/2 marathon thinking i have done this before, if i skip a day or 2 during a training cycle i still can hack it.  i paid for it big time during the race and vowed i would stick to the training plan for every other race i trained for. 

up until moving in with richard i only had to be semi-considerate of others for early morning workouts.  when living at home i had my own room to turn lights on as i needed, open/close as many drawers as necessary to find all my clothes, and set as many alarms as i wanted to.  once leaving my room i tried to be as quite and close the doors when i had lights on in the bathroom or kitchens.  our apartment is quite a bit smaller and i didnt realize how much noise i was really making while trying to get ready.  i do still set 2 alarms, its a pshcy thing that i think i am hitting the snooze button.  except now i quietly get out of bed and head into the bathroom once awake to this...

it has definitely kept me a lot more organized and cut down on the time it takes me to get ready.  who knew something as simple as getting my clothes together would be way more considerate to him still sleeping and so much easier on my life. 

the other big thing we had to get used to is the food part.  i have always been a curvy girl and have definitely let it get out of hand a few times in my life.  when we met i was on the losing weight track without even trying because of all the training, it was fantastic!  once that 1st race was done though i realized my body could quickly go back to the out of control curves if i wasnt careful.  i love food, and have come to understand that i can continue eating what i wanted as long as i was mindful of my portions.  richard and i have fairly similar tastes in food, both pretty plain and nothing too exotic.  when we 1st met his dad actually told me that he was hoping i could expand richards eating horizons!  (still one of the funniest conversations to this day.)  with richard trying to gain weight and me training/always wanting to lose weight as any other girl i have definitely learned that i need to watch what goes on my plate.  richard can eat whatever he wants whenever.  getting off work at 11pm he can stop at mcdonalds and get 2 mcdoubles, french fries, and a large coke and be fine.  i need to eat at a decent time and have become very diligent at counting calories.  even though i am in pretty much constant training i still cant eat just anything.  another example of our different dinners...

now our different work schedules for sure allow us to eat whatever we want when we get home.  the weekends get a little tricky sometimes when trying to choose a restaurant to eat at.  and when i get close to a race my food choices get stricter and stricter.  but we have been able to deal with our different tastes really well.  we are both even introducing the other to new food. 

merging your life with someone else is really hard at first.  you are trying to figure out how to share a closet and what to do when the other person is taking the longest shower ever and you need to finish getting ready (i would definitely be the one in the shower).  merging your athletic lives though is sometimes just as hard.  once you figure it out however it can really make both your lives so much easier. 

the day of l-o-v-e.

we all know that valentines day is definitely a holiday aimed at women, and as a woman i am proud to say that i fully support the holiday.  i have always been behind holidays no matter how big/small/silly/serious they are.  i wear red/white/blue at any holiday.  i will wear stick on tattoos on my face to represent a team or event.  valentines day is no different for me, single or in a relationship.

this was my first valentines day in the same relationship as the year before and i was super excited.  richard had been excited about my present for what seemed like months and i had no idea what it could be, which is exactly the way i wanted it.  i was really struggling on what to get richard though.  with the holiday being pretty girly its hard to decide what to get your guy that is romantic without being over the top mushy.  i am a hopeless romantic, there is no doubt about that.  i watch mushy movies and think how amazing it would be to be swept away from the palace by a prince and what it would be like to come home to a path of rose petals with candles everywhere just because its a friday night.  like i said, a hopeless romantic.

we had decided to celebrate on sunday because we were both off and there were a lot of things going on saturday.  after lots of thought i figured out my present for richard and was really excited about it.  but when my brother asked what i had got him and i let him in on the secret he didnt seemed that impressed.  once he thought about it though, he realized it actually was a good gift for a guy.  earlier in the week we had both talked about cooking dinner for each other and that we both actually wanted to be the one make the meal.  i had decided that i was going to save up my idea for his birthday and he could have that day to cook.  after waking up late in the morning i got up to wrap his presents in the least girly valentines wrapping paper i could find.  i proudly brought the presents out and suggested that we go run our errands so we could come home and celebrate the day.  the look on his face though meant there was no way we were leaving without gift opening, he was dying to know what were in those boxes.

i decided he could open one before we left, this way i could stretch things out through the day.  it was then i realized how much the presents went together.  i had purchased a black tuxedo vest he had been eyeing since christmas from h&m.  well with any vest you need a new dress shirt to go with it.  i let him open the shirt first and could see the let down on his face.  there was no way i could not have him open the vest at the same time.  instant grin!  there was also a candy box pack of wonka candy he had seen a few months before at a candy store i went back to pick up.  for as much as i struggled with the ideas, he was super excited about the new things to add to his wardrobe.  and of course the candy was a huge hit!

i couldnt wait for my present.  there was no card in the bag, and i thought maybe he was saving it for the actual day on monday.  i also knew there were no flowers in my future.  he had told me the week before that i was not getting flowers.  i was a little bummed that there were no flowers, i was even more bummed that he had told me the week before, a girl has to have something to hope for.  first i opened a precious moments box with a horseman and a sign that said "hail to the princess".  it was beautiful and had a chain like it attached to something else.  then he opened the ottoman (sneaky) and pulled out another bag.  inside this box was a beautiful cinderella precious moment on a carriage complete with a glass slipper and a pumpkin.  there was another chain on this piece, but they did not go together...definitely left the door open for future pieces.

we got ready soon after and decided what to do for dinner.  since i left him up to the task of dinner we were in debate.  i was gladly going to take the dinner task because i was hoping there were going to be pink chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast.  but once he was insistent on dinner i knew there wouldnt be.  the year before was one of the first times we actually made dinner together and had made crab legs and steaks.  richard had decided he wanted to do something similar.  well the the night before we had red lobster with my brother so valentine dinner was back up for debate.  we were both hoping for lucilles bbq on saturday night so we decided thats what we needed to have on sunday instead.  we could run our errands and then pick it up on the way home and hang out on our couch together eating.

it was such a simple romantic day.  just the two of us at home doing our own thing together.  we did just that with our bbq and pjs on the couch watching things we had dvrd.  there is so much pressure to spend lots of money on each other and declare you love in these huge gestures.  now the hopeless romantic in me loves a gesture, but sometimes just spending the day together is perfect. 

the little things no one tells you.

when you move in with someone, whether it be a significant other or your best girlfriend you have a certain picture in your head.  the way he will look when he walks through the door every night to come home to you.  how great it will be to wake up to him everyday.  the way your heart will be content staying in on a saturday night cuddled up on the couch together.  then the move actually happens and the fairytale in your head seems to play out differently in real life.

now dont get me wrong, this move is one of the best decisions i have made in my whole life.  and i love living with richard.  i just didnt know the adjustment period would be so...much.  there are so many things that you dont even realize, i thought i would indulge you with a few.

the sleeping.

i used to stay at richards house on the weekends, and loved waking up to him every morning.  it was extra special weekend treat.  so when we moved in i thought that would be one of my favorite parts, and it is.  except that we dont really get the opportunity to go to bed together.  so i fall asleep on my side, which is awkward.  then he comes in later and has to adjust, flopping all over the place trying to fall asleep.

what seems like a mere few hours later my 1st alarm goes off to get up for my morning run/workout.  i actually set two 15 minutes apart so that i can hit the snooze button without being rushed.  i know it drives richard crazy, but its a pshchy thing. 

the thing we finally conquered were the sheets and the fan.  growing up i have always slept on flannel, even in the summer, just with less blankets than the winter and a ceiling fan.  he always slept on cotton with no top sheet just the comforter and the loudest fan in the world.  after weeks of not sleeping well because of him flopping around like a fish when the fan was on and me freezing because there was no top sheet we had to do something.  we agreed upon putting a flannel top sheet on the bed and not turning the fan on in the winter.  pnce richard got over having the sheet tucked into the bottom of the bed, we have been sleeping great ever since. 

the bathroom counter.

for the last few years i have a had bathroom to myself where i could spread out as much as i wanted to, and i did, often.  so now going back to sharing has been a bit of adjustment and i know that one of the few things that drives richard over the edge is the way i leave things on the counter.  1st i rarely put the cap on the toothpaste.  its my own tube, i never have.  havent really seen the point.  i know the end gets a little crusty (gross) and sometimes i end up wasting some of the toothpaste.  but it never really drives me to put the cap back on.  2nd i leave hair things all over the counter.  clips, bobby pins, rubber bands, and bows.  now they are not stacked so high you cant see what they are, but usually i am in a hurry and they dont always make it back into the drawer.  and 3rd is the fact i leave things on his side of the counter.  i am right handed and have the left side of the sink.  he is left handed and has the right side of the sink.  probably not the best planning, but its the way it happened.  i think the fact that i leave things on the counter comes from being in a rush.  its never on purpose or to drive him crazy.  it just happens.  i really am trying to get better about all 3, i know that the toothpaste cap is definitely the biggest.

the dirty dishes. 

i am definitely not the cleanest person in the world.  i leave things on the floor.  my shoes are usually under the table and not in the closet.  the mail will sit on the counter for a few days before i throw things away.  however i am not so messy that i let mold grow on things or i have 3 inches of dust on everything.   one of my biggest pet peeves is leaving dishes in the sink.  now if you are cooking and then eat right after, thats ok, leave them in there until you are ready to clean up.  leave them in there overnight or to "soak" and i might go crazy.  getting up in the morning and seeing his dishes (that dont need to soak by the way) still in the sink the next morning is enough to drive me over the edge.  just put them in the freaking dishwasher that is right there ready to be loaded.  he always tells me he is too tired and they need to soak overnight.  so that is on one side of the sink.  the other side has the hand blender that he mixes his shakes with and the shaker bottle.  now we dont have a very big sink and i am super clumsy so i always know everything over.  then i get super frustrated because there is not enough room in the sink for me to get water and i refuse to put his dishes away.  were still working on this one. 

the laundry. 

when i said i am not the cleanest person, this is never a clearer statement than when it comes to laundry.  i leave my clothes on the floor of the bathroom under the towels because thats where they drop when i am ready to take a shower.  its definitely not a basket, but out of the way so you can still walk through.  now yes, it may take a few days for them to get put into the actual laundry basket less than 15 feet away, but at least you do not have to walk on them.  richard, not so much.  all of his clothes land in front of the dresser, no matter what.  now by the end of the week i can barely open my bottom drawer to get shorts out for my run.  yes, i do occasionally contribute to that pile with a piece or 2 of clothing.  mostly because i am so frustrated that his clothes are everywhere. 

when i actually do laundry (we do ours separate because i have cooties lol) i am soooo not good at putting them away.  1st it takes me forever to complete laundry because i forget it is in there.  there are also certain things that dont go in the dryer, such as bras, jeans, and dress pants.  these things naturally go over the shower curtain to air dry.  i should have added that to richards bathroom pet peeve list.  once it is done i fold everything and leave it on the dryer...for days.  most of the time for the whole week.  i just live off the dryer.  now i think this drives richard a little bananas.  almost as much as it drives me crazy that he will take out his clean clothes and throw them in a pile on the bed.  and then leave them there all day.  when i am finally ready for bed, they usually end up in a pile on the floor.  and so the cycle begins again.  did i mention you must step on all the clothes to get that loud awful fan?  were still working on this one too. 

im sure as those of you reading this that have been through the adjustment period are dying with laughter.  and i know that in a few years we are going to think this is all hilarious, but for now it is what we are working on.  we have definitely conquered a few things along the way.  for example if i go for an early run i now put my things in the bathroom the night before so he can sleep.  he comes to bed with me sometimes and just lays there as i fall asleep so i dont feel so awkward sleeping on the one side.  we both check what the other is recording to make sure the person home can watch tv even if you are recording something.  he takes things out of the freezer so i have something to eat for dinner without a lot of effort.  i put away the dishes when i get home that he turned on before he left for work so neither one of us has to listen to the dishwasher while trying to watch tv.  who knew these little things we have learned to do for the other could make such a big difference when you are home without the other person?

the start of something new.

new years is time where we throw out the old and ring in the new.  where party poppers, champagne, and funny hats run wild.  we look at the last year and think about all the great things we did and what we want to change in the upcoming year.  and of course resolutions.

this new years was a bit of a different concept for me.  it was the first year i would be able to kiss the same person as the year before as previous relationships had never lasted through 2 new years eves.  i also had a bit of a desire for something new to do for the evening.  being young and not having a ton of money we are all limited to the things we can do.  i have always wanted though, to get all gussied up and go out to a high end place, drink martinis out of real glasses and countdown with a drop ball of our own.  ::sigh:: maybe one day. 

we decided to keep it simple, and a little inexpensive, by going to matts house for the new years eve party/rave.  we arrived about 9pm and were immediately immersed in the activities!  eating, of course, and making vanessas famous jungle juice in the same container we would be storing our ornaments in a few days later.  the inside of the house was the party scene and the garage had been turned into a glow-in-the-dark world.  the cups for beer pong had been highlighted so they would glow.  there was a projector on the wall with the weird graphic that plays on windows media player, it was very cool though.  there were enough glow-sticks to dress an army that of course we all donned proudly. 

the night seemed to fly!  i didnt see much of richard in the beginning of the night, as soon as the drinks started pouring we both seemed to go different ways.  and for the first time, i felt comfortable enough to be ok with that.  i felt like the group had really accepted me and i could have my own conversations with them.  there was also more girls being added to the group, which usually doesnt make things easier, but for some reason in this group it does.  i guess being around for a year and a half really makes me one of the group now. 

as midnight approached we all started piling into the living room/kitchen where the tv was getting ready to countdown to the magical time.  richard and i found each other in the kitchen and were instantly wrapped up together.  when the final countdown was complete there was celebration all over the house.  happy new years wishes spread everywhere, hugs abound, and kisses all over.  our new years kiss though, was a different kind of magic.  it was like the rest of the room stopped and i was only in there with him.  it was the kind of kiss you hear about in books and movies, but not in real life.  maybe it was a little bit of the jungle juice we both had, or maybe it was the aura of the 2nd year kiss.  either way it was the best new years kiss i have ever had. 

the party raged on for the next few hours and before any of us knew it was 2am.  we were all starving by this point and not suited to go anywhere.  thank goodness lora and mike had brought frozen pizza.  lora and i of course had a system going and were doling out pizza only to the people we knew/liked.  soon after that the party started to die down and we all were making our way home.  richard and i left soon later, so exhausted im surprised we made it home. 

we woke the next day with a bright start to the new year.  nothing had been bad, nothing had been good, i hadnt overreacted to anything, and no bad news had been given.  it was the epitome of a clean slate, a fresh start for everyone.  we had decided to start the new year focused on our apartment...shopping for a new couch.  later in the day my family was hosting a new years dinner, so we had a few hours to do our shopping.  jennifer had told me about the rc wiley clearance center in north las vegas that would give us a smokin deal, and i finally convinced richard it was time to look.  i had been looking for a few weeks and knew basically what i wanted.  we had decided we wanted a sectional with the long end on the left hand side to go underneath the window.  we ventured up north and instantly found the perfect couch, dark brown, suede, and huge.  i was positive and ready to purchase.  richard however was not so sure.  we ended up sitting on that couch for about a half hour talking about things, it was actually really helpful. 

not quite ready to purchase we headed back down the freeway to check out ashley furniture and walker furniture.  ashley had a great couch that would have been perfect if the back cushions hadnt been pillows.  and walker, well this was the best we found...

it was kind of cool, just not our style.  after this we decided it was time to head back to our beautiful brown couch at rc wiley.  we were definitely running out of time, but were afraid that if we didnt buy it today it might not be there.  when we got back it was pretty quick and easy process, and i recruited my brother to help me pick up the couch monday after work. 

after the purchase we headed out to my parents house and were greeted by big congratulations from my family.  it was our first big purchase together.  it made me realize, i was really in this, full force. 

i decided this year i am not going to make the typical lose weight, quit drinking, get organzied resolutions.  i want this year to be about making myself happy.  continuing my running and actually enjoying it.  learn to take a step back sometimes before reacting.  and try not to be so hard on myself.  surround myself with people i love and enjoy.  it is the turn of a new decade, time for a whole new way to grow. 

the christmas story.

after great anticipation all year long christmas weekend had finally arrived!  this year christmas fell on a saturday so we had an instant 3-day weekend without even trying.  with all the running around and work that richard and i had been doing we hadnt had a lot of time to do the few traditions we had started the year before.  we also hadnt been able to spend much uninterrupted time together either.  so we decided to squish everything we could into the weekend. 

we started by sleeping in friday morning, that alone is an amazing start to any 3-day weekend.  richard had told me the night before that he a had a last minute thing or 2 he had to pick up that morning.  while i giggled a lot-last year he had waited until christmas eve to buy all of his gifts-i decided i would get up and go for a run that morning then.  feeling very accomplished when i returned i decided to reward myself by registering for my next 1/2 marathon in nashville, tn!

richard hadnt gotten back quite yet and i needed to run over to the grocery store to pick up our 2 last minute things for breakfast the next morning.  as i headed out to the store i called my mom to see if she needed anything since she was cooking the next day, bad idea.  30 minutes and $25 later i returned home to spend the rest of the day with my love. 

later that evening we made the trek to the las vegas' north pole at the speedway for the gift of lights.  we had both gone for the 1st time the previous year and totally fell in love, definitely making it a tradition for us.  this year there was no line, hooray, so we drove through right away.  it was beautiful.  not nearly as good as the year before at sunset park, but it was fun to just be together with the 2 of us.

we headed back into town towards the conservatory inside the bellagio, one of my absolutely favorite places on the planet.  i still had not seen tiffany to give her, her christmas gift and we were trying to make it happen that night.  we ended up meeting in a del taco parking lot because we couldnt figure out anywhere else, weird i know.  after getting back on the road and getting closer to the bellagio, we accidentally picked the wrong lane and got boxed out of turning in.  of course it took forever to turn back around and make it through all the lights, by now which richard was getting pretty frustrated.  we made our way into the garage and it literally took almost a 1/2 hour to find a parking spot!  just as we were about to give up, one opened for us finally.  and of course it was worth every minute of wait...

 by this time it was darn near 830p and i had originally planned to cook that night once we got home.  fully prepared to go home and make fajitas, richard kept hinting he didnt want to wait that long.  so we did the most logical thing instead...pick up raisin canes.  its not richards favorite place, so anytime he wants to go i am so on board.  we made our way home to watch one of my all time favorite christmas movies, the family stone.  i had finally convinced richard to watch it with me.  we sat down to watch and before i even knew what happened richard is yelling and damn near throwing his food out the window, asking me if i like the canes sauce.  apparently he didnt see that it came on the sandwhich and he likes his things super plain, not even ketchup.  he stormed off into the kitchen after i told him no, not knowing, to turn on the oven to make something else.  i kept saying that i would eat the the sandwich with the sauce, i just put ketchup on top anyway and he kept saying you said you didnt like the sauce.   finally he slowed down long enough to listen and let me take the sandwich he didnt like and let him have my strips.  between the traffic and the order mess up it was not going well, it was better, but he still seemed so mad.  we finished the movie, i of course cried, and was ready for bed.  richard wanted to stay up because he always went to bed late and he still had to wrap all of my presents.  we decided to set an alarm for the next morning at 1030am to give us plenty of time to get up, make breakfast, take our time opening presents, and hang out for a bit. 

however, long about 9am i was ready to get up and open presents!  i mean it is christmas.  instead i decided to go in and make breakfast to keep myself busy.  that lasted about a half hour and i decided it was time to wake up richard, that didnt go too well.  he was not excited about me waking him up to open presents at all, he kept trying to convince me to go back to bed, i was wayyyy too awake for that.  so i let him sleep and went to try to upload pictures from the night before.  he came out a few minutes later and told me he was awake enough, we could open presents.  so as i started to bring the breakfast stuff over i found him curled up on the couch under the blanket barely willing to even open his eyes.  so not ok.  instead i made him sit on the floor with me and the bacon that didnt wiggle.

we began with stockings, something i struggled with the most to fill.  turns out we bought each other the exact same thing, silly candy and beautiful cards!  we continued on to more wrapped boxes filled with cartoon character t-shirts, flasks, and electric toothbrushes for him.  and minions, disney character mugs, ladybug girls, and sparkly earrings for me.  both of us were beyond excited about our gifts!  we ended up opening a little faster than we expected and once finished just looked at each other like now what?  so we cleaned up breakfast and decided to go back to bed before heading over to my parents house.

a few hours later we loaded up my car with the gifts and made our way up to my parents house to have christmas part 2.  we had to make sure we came over before erik and his family got there so we could do our family christmas.  it was so fun!  we had multiple gifts for all of us and they were all really thought out, the best was my minnie mouse seatbelt wallet.  as we were leaving the apartment we had to make sure we grabbed the last of my dads tools to take back, and i made the joke, wouldnt it be so funny if the presents under my parents tree were tools.  i told him though, thats how you really know you made it into the family because thats what we always bought my dad. 

erik and donna came over a little while later to help finish making dinner and so we could finally eat.  we had very entertaining dinner conversation that kyle holding me back at one point and richard defending me at another point.  after that i tried to drive moms car to the movie, it didnt fly well.  quite a few years ago the four of us started going to a movie together on christmas.  we had gotten old enough to not have lots of toys, so we would get bored with nothing to do.  last year we picked a boy movie in sherlock homes, this year we picked a girl movie in tangled.  it was really cute, very disney, very cute.

richard and i made our way home after going back to my parents house for pie, we had been there most of the day and were ready to go home.  or so i thought.  richard ended up deciding to go to matts house after we got home for a few hours.  i was tired anyway i guess and just wanted to spend time on my couch, while thinking about such a successful day.

this was our first christmas living together.  we got to start our own traditions and do them the way we want.  it was like a real grown up christmas, our way:)

the ornament party.

a few weeks before thanksgiving we had decided to have our very first christmas party.  i was super stoked, always wanting to have my own place to throw a party.  richard was equally stoked to show off our place now that we had lived there over 2 months and to have so many of our friends together.  there was of course a great debate on which weekend to have it, as finally settled on the 18th of december.  i had decided not to put up a facebook invite after we got home from our thanksgiving weekend because i thought it was too soon and people would probably forget by the time the party rolled around.  other planning was beginning to come together though.  we thought about doing a secret santa, but that would be hard with such different groups of friends not knowing each other.  then we thought about white elephant, but werent super excited about that so we decided to just make the decision when it got closer to time.

when we got home from thanksgiving richard went over to hang out at matts house and found out that he was also planning some kiond of holiday party.  richard told him we were thinking the 18th and they said no problem, they would figure out a different weekend.  a few days later the facebook invite showed up in my requests folder while i was at work and i knew this was not going to be good.  it was also for the 18th.  now mind you, we had not sent ours out yet because i thought it was too soon, guess not.  the invite had said they were flexible and realistically so we were we, we hadnt set the actual date yet.  i received a text from richard asking what we were going to do now and see it hadnt been too early for the invite.  i suggested we talk to the matt and see what other weekend they were thinking and then go from there.  while i emailed matt, the we should have sent it out turned into a quick downward spiral into maybe we just shouldnt do this at all because it wouldnt be the right weekend.  after emailing a few times with matt i realized how loose their plans were and knew that we could easily figure this out, richard however was not at all convinced.  while on lunch that day i called him to tell him what matt and i talked about, but he was still not convinced and the spiral was going farther down.  luckily matt actually walked into the lunchroom at that moment and he and richard ended up talking about the whole thing and figuring it out in about 2 minutes flat.  we would keep the 18th and he would take a friday either the day before or the weekend before, problem solved!

planning continued and we finally decided on a theme for the party!  since it was our first year in the new place our tree was a little sparse and we were trying to come up with ways to fill it.  with help from jodi we decided to make our theme an ornament party.  instead of spending money on a secret santa gift, guests would take the money and purchase an ornament for our tree that would remind us of you and that we would keep for seasons to come.  we had also decided to do appetizer/dessert foods so that people could come and go as they needed to.  the weekend was getting closer and closer and we just had to buy the last few things to be completely ready.  i didnt have to work that morning, but did have a 2 year-old birthday party to attend that afternoon for a family friend.  my plan was to get everything baked, cleaned, and put together before i had to leave so when i came home i had very little to finish up.

it all sounded like such a great plan, until you actually put life in there.  richard did errands in the morning to finish his things up, and nothing was going right.  he couldnt find the things he needed and people were in the full christmas mean mode of shopping.  i ended up staying about 45 minutes too late at the birthday party, which meant i was late getting home.  he was upset cause i lost track of time, i didnt think it was that big of a deal as long as i got everything done, which was going to be tight.  he offered to help put the last minute food things together so i gave him the punch detail.  as he was combining things together we realized there wasnt enough alcohol for the punch recipe, and all hell broke loose.  he was mad at me because i didnt tell him the right amount.  i was mad because he didnt look at the recipe i gave him.  he was mad because i stayed at the party too long and didnt plan well enough.  i was mad because the last minute things were taking too long.  both of us stomping around mad at the other, richard decided to go get the alcohol and i decided to stay and finish my things.  i finished a few minutes before he got back so i decided to take out the trash to help.  on my way to the dumpster i passed him and he wouldnt even look at me.

we came back upstairs and didnt even speak to each other, oh except for him to ask if i was going to take a shower because i stunk, which definitely helped my mood.  i finished my appetizer things and left for the shower still not talking.  after getting dressed i knew we had to at least figure this out a little bit because all our friends were coming over in about an hour.  i finally broke the silence and apologized for running late, well that just opened a whole door of pent up things.  we had a pretty serious discussion the weekend before because i was pretty upset and thought things had been resolved, guess not.  he had said his piece, i felt about 3 inches tall, but knew we couldnt have an all out argument because we were running out of time.  so i kept it all in and finished getting ready.   he seemed better once getting it all out and was helping set the table and arranging food so i ran with it.

the party was a definite hit!  everyone really got into the ornament buying and had to find the perfect one.  they loved the food and could not believe how many decorations we had for just being our first year.  it was a small party, which was fine with us, but it was definitely a good tradition to start.

that same night there was a pretty big ufc fight happening, which i was afraid was going to totally derail the party plans.  but the guys had been big thinkers and taped the fight to watch once the party was over, thank goodness.  (ufc fighting is just not one of my favorite things, im not so good with that stuff.  but richard loves it and so does his friends.)  right around 10 everyone was pretty full and the guys were ready to go watch the fight.  i stayed home, gladly, to clean up and hang out with the newest girl in the group (had to feel her out).  i think it was one of the best things for richard and i to spend a few hours apart anyway, still not super settled on our fight.  we hadnt really hung out a lot during the party, both keeping busy on purpose with others.  this was our first really big fight since we moved in together and we were trying to figure out how to do all of this.

girl time with heather and a very drunk lora is exactly what i needed.  mike and lora had shown up right as the guys were headed over to matts to watch the fight.  so we kept lora with us and mike went with the guys.  i was going to take heather home later and pick up richard when they were done with all their manly things.  the girls talked about so much and i got great advice from lora.  like i said, it was exactly what i needed.  i realized some things i definitely had done wrong and was able to clear my head so that richard and i could talk about them later and not be defensive.

as the guys finished the fight lora left to pick up mike while heather and i stayed for awhile longer.  the original plan was to drop heather off at matts and pick up richard at the same time when he was ready.  after both of us falling asleep on the couch we decided to just take her home and i would go out again later and get richard.  i was trying to give both of us space and had no problem going out again later.  right as i was getting home he called.  he said he wasnt quite ready to come home and anthony would actually bring him home later.  i was a little sad, but so glad he had called, i knew that everything would be ok.

once he got home that night i was already asleep and he was not feeling good.  he woke me up to let me know he was home and then he started getting sick.  he hadnt really eaten that day, then drank all night, and we had a pretty big fight.  i immediately got up and tried to help out anyway that i could.  it actually was a blessing in disguise.  we both started openly talking and being very vulnerable to each other.  we both apologized and admitted to those we had done wrong.  we realized in that night that the newness had really worn off.  we really lived together and were starting to find out a whole new level of the other person.  a friend had told me the first year is the hardest thing ever.  the second year is so much easier, and the third year is amazing.  up until this point everything had been so easy.  i really thought we had skipped the hard part, definitely realized we were not any different than any other 2 people who lived together.

the holiday party was a great success, even with all the things that went awry.  we definitely figured out a little bit more about each other and that it was ok to fight and then take space.  as long as we came back to the table and could talk openly with each other.  and we had a whole new set of fantastic ornaments added to our tree!